I don't think many of my friends (and maybe even some family members) know the background story of how God led my hubby and me together. Some of the story may surprise you, but with us coming upon 8 months of marriage I can without a doubt say that we were God's "intended" for each other. :)
So there I was, in my senior year of college and still no man in my life, let alone an engagement ring on my finger! I had started praying for the man that I would one day marry, way back in junior high and had made a promise to God that I would wait for him. I dated several guys throughout college, but had NEVER felt a complete peace in my heart about any of them. Now I'll admit that there were times when I would let my emotions guide me instead of the Holy Spirit's leading. I didn't want to end up alone so I held on to some relationships longer than I should've. That got me into trouble on a few occasions, and my actions hurt some people emotionally. It took me awhile to learn that what maybe just a few dates to me actually meant much more to the other person. I would say that I do regret dating as much as I did in college. I fell under the false pretense that I HAD to have a date for every college activity or else I would look "unpopular" or "unattractive". That way of thinking took me on an emotionally roller coaster many a time. The times that I would not get asked, I would feel sorry for myself and sometimes junk out with unhealthy food with my friends. (ugh, soooo bad) Now I am not trying to confess all of my faults, but for those young women who may read this, I hope you can learn from these errors.
*Don't Get Desperate!
Looking back, I spent way too much time thinking what was wrong with me rather than immersing myself in school and growing in the Lord. God gave me so much grace, and my dear family was so patient with me when I was no fun to be around.
*Don't Go Overboard!
College girls get a lot of dating advice. Most of it is with good intentions in mind, but sometimes I felt like I had to try it all, otherwise I would be seen as one who wasn't "trying". For instance, someone said to bake cookies for the guy you had a crush on. Well... I did this and afterward felt SO DUMB because he didn't know me from Adam and ending up asking another girl on my dorm floor for a date. Embarrassed much? Lol This method may have worked for some, but it made me look like I was trying TOO hard. So pick and choose what advice you apply to your own situation, but try not to set yourself up for rejection.
*Do Be Observant
I first noticed my husband, after he held the door open for me at breakfast in the dining hall. He did this for all the girls, and I was so impressed by that because believe it or not, not all the guys at Bible college did. From then on, I would notice him in chapel (not on his phone or messing around), and liked the fact that he always looked sharp. There was something about him that drew me to him although I didn't know what. Don't be stalker, but watch for the kind of guys or should I say men who treat ALL the girls with respect, are not late to class, don't sit on the back of chapel habitually, and other traits that you look for in a good guy.
~The Way It Began~
The way we first met, was actually through a mutual guy friend. It was the week of my birthday, and I was leaving in the next few days to go on tour for the college all summer. My guy friend was not a student at the college, but he wanted to give me a bday card before I left. So, he gave it to Greg to give to me. (Whether this was planned or not by my friend, I do not know, but I had told him before that I was "interested" in Greg lol) We had to get in contact by phone for a place to meet so he could give me the card. So the first step was completed, we had each other's numbers! ;) After a 10 second meeting, we went our ways. Later that night, I realized that I had to move ALL of my things from my dorm up to the second floor storage area for the summer. So as they say, desperate times call for desperate measures, I picked up the phone and texted him asking if there was anyway he could help me move. His response was that he was already helping another single girl move, but that afterwards he could. We had some small talk as we worked, but that was about it. We texted on and off a few days after, but it died off....
I traveled the West all summer, and then we came back to Hammond for Youth Conference. He happened to be helping with the microphones for one of the sessions that my group was singing in. He texted me after we sang that our group sounded good which was a pleasant surprise. We ended up keeping in touch after I went home and mostly talked about the Olympics which we were both fans of. I told him that I was coming up to Hammond to go to my nephew's bday party on a Saturday. He asked if I would sit with him in church on that Sunday morning. He ended up meeting my dad on the first date! lol We pretty much were inseparable from then on.
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So there I was, in my senior year of college and still no man in my life, let alone an engagement ring on my finger! I had started praying for the man that I would one day marry, way back in junior high and had made a promise to God that I would wait for him. I dated several guys throughout college, but had NEVER felt a complete peace in my heart about any of them. Now I'll admit that there were times when I would let my emotions guide me instead of the Holy Spirit's leading. I didn't want to end up alone so I held on to some relationships longer than I should've. That got me into trouble on a few occasions, and my actions hurt some people emotionally. It took me awhile to learn that what maybe just a few dates to me actually meant much more to the other person. I would say that I do regret dating as much as I did in college. I fell under the false pretense that I HAD to have a date for every college activity or else I would look "unpopular" or "unattractive". That way of thinking took me on an emotionally roller coaster many a time. The times that I would not get asked, I would feel sorry for myself and sometimes junk out with unhealthy food with my friends. (ugh, soooo bad) Now I am not trying to confess all of my faults, but for those young women who may read this, I hope you can learn from these errors.
*Don't Get Desperate!
Looking back, I spent way too much time thinking what was wrong with me rather than immersing myself in school and growing in the Lord. God gave me so much grace, and my dear family was so patient with me when I was no fun to be around.
*Don't Go Overboard!
College girls get a lot of dating advice. Most of it is with good intentions in mind, but sometimes I felt like I had to try it all, otherwise I would be seen as one who wasn't "trying". For instance, someone said to bake cookies for the guy you had a crush on. Well... I did this and afterward felt SO DUMB because he didn't know me from Adam and ending up asking another girl on my dorm floor for a date. Embarrassed much? Lol This method may have worked for some, but it made me look like I was trying TOO hard. So pick and choose what advice you apply to your own situation, but try not to set yourself up for rejection.
*Do Be Observant
I first noticed my husband, after he held the door open for me at breakfast in the dining hall. He did this for all the girls, and I was so impressed by that because believe it or not, not all the guys at Bible college did. From then on, I would notice him in chapel (not on his phone or messing around), and liked the fact that he always looked sharp. There was something about him that drew me to him although I didn't know what. Don't be stalker, but watch for the kind of guys or should I say men who treat ALL the girls with respect, are not late to class, don't sit on the back of chapel habitually, and other traits that you look for in a good guy.
~The Way It Began~
The way we first met, was actually through a mutual guy friend. It was the week of my birthday, and I was leaving in the next few days to go on tour for the college all summer. My guy friend was not a student at the college, but he wanted to give me a bday card before I left. So, he gave it to Greg to give to me. (Whether this was planned or not by my friend, I do not know, but I had told him before that I was "interested" in Greg lol) We had to get in contact by phone for a place to meet so he could give me the card. So the first step was completed, we had each other's numbers! ;) After a 10 second meeting, we went our ways. Later that night, I realized that I had to move ALL of my things from my dorm up to the second floor storage area for the summer. So as they say, desperate times call for desperate measures, I picked up the phone and texted him asking if there was anyway he could help me move. His response was that he was already helping another single girl move, but that afterwards he could. We had some small talk as we worked, but that was about it. We texted on and off a few days after, but it died off....
I traveled the West all summer, and then we came back to Hammond for Youth Conference. He happened to be helping with the microphones for one of the sessions that my group was singing in. He texted me after we sang that our group sounded good which was a pleasant surprise. We ended up keeping in touch after I went home and mostly talked about the Olympics which we were both fans of. I told him that I was coming up to Hammond to go to my nephew's bday party on a Saturday. He asked if I would sit with him in church on that Sunday morning. He ended up meeting my dad on the first date! lol We pretty much were inseparable from then on.
We became boyfriend & girlfriend on September 21st, 2012 at the dunes.
He gave me a beautiful bracelet!
Met my parents & family the next month
He told me he loved me on February 16, 2013 <3
We got engaged in Chicago on July 27, 2013!
Tied the knot on April 5, 2014:)
Yes that's correct, altogether we dated and were engaged a little over 1 year and 7 months before we were married! Here are some of the reasons why I believe our hearts were knitted so fast and made our love for each other grow so quickly.
1. Our Pasts Were Similar
We actually grew up in two different countries- he in Mexico, and me in Indiana- but we both had 5 kids in our families, both of our parents were 1st generation Christians that raised their children in church, our dads both instilled in us a hard work ethic, both of our fathers are very strong men (personality, spirit), our parents have both been married over 30 years, and all of our siblings went to the same college...and so on! We had a lot in common and that we could both relate to.
2. Common Interests
The Olympics was actually the first subject that we really connected on because we both had a fascination and interest in it. As we continued to get to know each other, we discovered more commonalties of hobbies, but more importantly life goals, and the desire to serve God with our lives. We also both wanted to have our first kiss at the altar and I'm thankful that it came to pass!
3. Tough Times
The fall of 2012 when we started dating was the last semester of college for me. I was working part-time and student teaching at the junior high. Greg was working and going to school full time too. (He still had 3 semesters left) Our college was going through a hard time with losing our pastor, and Greg's grandpa passed away that October. It was a stressful time that put a lot of pressure on our new relationship. But thankfully, it caused us to learn how to support each other early on.
All of these factors caused our relationship to blossom at a quicker pace than most. It also helped that I was about to graduate from college, and he was achieving his degree at an accelerated pace. Being married to the man God chose for me, has been a dream come true! <3
Stephanie! Thanks for sharing your story! I agree with you wholeheartedly. I also followed lots of silly dating "advice" and it only led to heart break. When I met my husband though, I had such a different mindset. And so did he! Similar to you - it didn't take months and months of dating to know that we were meant to be! We just got married this past July :) similar time frame as you!
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